I Have Discovered Something about Myself

Hello,

In recent events I have discovered something about myself: I really like reading. I have always liked reading in general but I just love it. I've also been on the Waterstones website and looked at several books that I might want to read. But what's really annoying, I am not able to buy them and/or I am currently reading something else.

At this moment of my post, I am near the end of  Harry Potter 3. I read the first two back when I was nine but now I've decided to re-read them (which I don't like doing) and read the other five. Because of this, it might take me a while to finish the series before I read anything else. I don't really like reading a part of a series, then go on to a whole different book/series. So it really annoys me when I have to wait for a sequel to come out. When it comes to trilogies and such, I like to marathon read them, so one after the other. But then it's depressing when you've finished the series all together. 

Also, since I have watched the Maze Runner trailer a few times, I REALLY want to read/watch it, meaning that I'm starting to expand my reading horizons. Basically, I'm more into fantasy (with action and adventure) but by me wanting to read this particular trilogy I'm starting to get into the dystopian/sci-fi genre. I'm still debating whether or not I want to read Divergent or the Hunger Games, though.

I hope you didn't mind this post since it was book related. And if you did read it - thank you. And I just realised that it was quite random...

~Cupcake~

Contemplating Life

Hi. I know that probably no one is reading this at the moment, but I'm going to post anyway.

Recently, I have felt completely lost with my life - well especially recently (I have felt like this for a while). As a teen I feel like I'm forced to know what I want to do and/or be when I'm older. I pretty sure a lot of people around my age are in the same boat as me. Firstly, you have to choose your options in school (e.g. GCSE's in the UK) and usually they relate to your interests and what you want to do once you move out.

I don't particularly enjoy most of the stuff that I do in school so this seems like one of the hardest things in life for me. I don't even know if I want to go to University/College anyway!

Basically: I have NO IDEA of what I want to do in life.

As a Christian, I believe that I have a purpose in life - but I right now I don't know what that purpose is. Everyone finds out at different times in their life so I could just be impatient in order to find out mine.

I do have a few interests here and there, but they're not all exactly what school can offer me in general. Also, a few of my 'dreams' seem unrealistic because I doubt that I'll be good enough to make them come true. For example: acting. I did a bit of acting stuff here an there but I don't think I was that good. And now I'm starting to consider it again but as I think about it more, I don't think I have a chance.

And it's the same with the majority of 'dreams'/interests. Or perhaps I'm just being pessimistic; after all I'm not the optimistic type.

Anyway, I just feel like I'm staring at a blank space but at a bunch of cross roads at the same time. I hope I'm not the only one who's feeling stuck in life, not knowing where to go.

As I stated earlier, I don't really have an audience on this blog so this post does kinda seem pointless. But if someone DOES happen to read it I really appreciate it ('cause I'm a lonely person...).


~Cupcake~

WARNING: Lots of Capital Letters

Hi people of the world :-)

Today I have been a bit stressed and anxious just over some word document I forgot to save. It was one I started the other day, whilst my creative mind was flowing. From time to time, I think of story ideas but most of them don't end up being written down. I've recently gone through one of those phases and wrote a big chunky introductory paragraph. I was pleased with my result until now...

I  FORGOT TO SAVE THE STUPID DOCUMENT (don't worry, I'm not the swearing type so no rude words in this post especially).

I was on the internet for most of that day and I let my dad take his laptop and shut it down. Like before (I'm just assuming ATM) he just closed the document and pressed 'Don't Save'. My  dad has done that before to a piece of HW I had just started but it wasn't too big of a deal. THIS IS!!

Today I went to open and continue writing and then stress and sickness began to fill inside me. I searched everywhere, the 'rubbish bin', Google,  but their answers didn't help since I'm looking for it 2 days later!!

Now, I've created a new word document called: DO NOT FORGET TO SAVE PEOPLE. If that wasn't enough I typed the following words: DO NOT FORGET TO SAVE THIS DOCUMENT OTHERWISE I WILL BE EXTREMELY ANNOYED. A bit harsh, but they are in big, bold writing and on the first page. This should help everyone to remember to save - mainly me.

I guess after this annoying occurrence in my life I have learnt a lesson. DON'T FORGET TO SAVE YOUR WORK.

I leave with final thoughts: PLEASE SAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


~Cupcake~

Spring is here! (Ft. rare sun sightings)

It's been exactly been 1 month since my first blog post. I started writing another blog post a few weeks ago but I just don't know how to carry it on. Since today is officially the start of spring, I decided to write about spring. Enjoy!!

Firstly, I thought that the first day of spring was on the 21st of March, not the 20th. But according to Google it is today. Lately, the weather has been getting warmer meaning that Summer is one step closer. I think that spring is a nice time of year, despite of the stereotypical-ness of 'April Showers'. It rains throughout the year anyway. Moving on, I like how the flowers pop up and to me it's very nice to spot them. The most common flower that comes here in the UK is the daffodil. I find it very interesting that you can get a couple different daffodils. For instance, you can get a dark, orange middle and a light yellow outer. Spring is pretty and sweet. It isn't too hot or too cold. It's the time of the year that it starts to become lighter and warmer. It's just........................

Today, in the UK was a Solar Eclipse. Although I don't live in the Northern part, I still experienced getting a bit darker. Unfortunately, it just had to be a cloudy day and it could have been better if the sun showed its face. Oh well. I got to see a bit of some of the live footage and see what it was like above the clouds. Apparently, the best places to see this partial eclipse was on the Faroe and Svalbard islands. The next partial eclipse available in the UK is in 2026 and the next full one is in 2090. I don't if I'll be alive or not but i don't want to think of it that way.

Thank you for reading this short blog post. I don't know when I'll write the next. I really do appreacaite you taking your time to rread this because this is just a small blog.

~Cupcake~

Friends

Having friends is a vital part of life; it's unhealthy to have none. But, sometimes it's hard to find them and I know just how you feel. When I started school, I think I made friends quite easily, though I'm not friends with most of them nowadays. It goes to show that friends may be easy to find but are hard to keep. Until I moved schools in the middle of Year 5 I had a friendship group, so I have had several friends in the past. Although, once I had left, most of them turned their back on me, leaving 3 still my friend. Upon entering my new school, I knew no one so, the rest of Year 5 was hard socially. I made a few friends in Year 6 but now it's like we never knew each other...

When Secondary school came around, one of my biggest fears of starting was being able to find friends. I often asked myself "Will I make friends?". And that fear became partially true.

I had 2 girls from my old school get put in the same form as me. I was delighted since I would feel a bit more comfortable starting, what seemed, a big, scary school. I would hang out with these 2 girls but at times I would feel like that they would turn me down . Half way through the year, my 'friends' made new friends that I would hang out with also. I felt awkward hanging out with them and one girl kept saying "Shut up" to me - assuming that I would take the joke. I could tell that she meant to kid around but I didn't take it that way. It got really annoying and a couple of times she'd throw my water around and I would nearly loose my temper. One lunch time, I decided that I would never sit with them again. The same girl told me "Why don't you just die already?". I was appalled. Did she ever realise that what she said was hurtful? I assumed that she was joking but that just isn't a nice thing to say anyway! After she said that to me I picked up my stuff and left. I then went to my friend and told her what happened. She was shocked as well. 

After leaving my so called 'friends' I hung out with my friend for the rest of the year. I did that in Year 8 as well, but sometimes I wouldn't be able to sit with her. She had a couple of other friends too and they didn't seem to mind me. Even though I had a friend, I still felt lonely and felt like people rejected me. I still feel that way today...

~Cupcake~